Don’t Get Me Wrong, I’m Mailing It Out Right Away
Has anyone else started getting chain letters recentlyphysical, printed (well, poorly photocopied) chain letters sent through the mail? I’ve gotten two of basically the same one in the past couple of months. Prior to this, I hadn’t seen a non-virtual chain letter since probably the early 1980s.
In the most recent one I received, from someone in Tehachapi, CA, the photocopying is so many generations removed from the original as to be barely legible. The name of the company from which you’re supposed to order a mailing list, and the price of that list, are in fact illegible:
I presume it’s “Data Line” and it sort of looks like $40.00, but it could also almost be “Dalai Lama” and $110.00. I’m tempted to call the 800 number just to see if a Tibetan answers.
I enjoyed the subsequent instructions:
The best part is that the names come on self-adhesive labels that you peel and stick right to an envelope.
Really? Right to an envelope? There’s no intermediate step involved after the peeling? Anyway, I appreciate their spelling out what “self-adhesive” means.
Go to your local Post Office and purchase 200 of their 37-cent stamps and place them on the envelopes. (They sell rolls of 100 stamps that are self-adhesive.)
I might have even better luck with 39-cent stamps, since the postal rates went up, oh, a year ago. But again, the thoroughness in telling me I must place the stamps on the envelopes is appreciated.
Thankfully, the disturbing “So-and-so broke the chain and also his neck” threats I recall from bygone chain letters are absent.
Weren’t the monetary type of chain letters of old simply pyramid schemes, intended to enrich their nominal originators? The “buy a mailing list” angle seems new. So I suspect the re-emergence of the chain letter results from the Dalai Lama, or maybe some company called Data Line, realizing they couldn’t hack it in the increasingly competitive world of online spam, and opting for a USPS-based scam.
Oh, and page 2 of this letter begins: “My name is Dick Hollman.”