On This Day Pre-Y2K

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May 8, 1999 Permalink

Sometimes, I think that while preparing to save my body, I am gradually losing my mind.

Lately, I feel as if the gov’t/media “spin” on how OK everything is going to be has, despite my better sense, seeped into the corners of my skull and affected my thinking.

I haven’t been stopping by the store so much to buy little things to prepare anymore. I haven’t been as concerned. Has something changed? Not that I know of. Maybe I’m temporarily out of steam. I don’t know.

I’ve often had to pull back, pull out of any thinking about it, to give myself a week or two to let my emotions simmer down, to get out of tunnel vision. This isn’t quite like that though. This is different. This is like... like, no matter what I *know* in my head, somehow my brain is actually being influenced by the sheer quantity of positive media about Y2K. It is horrifying to see in myself. It reminds me of this hilariously campy TV movie called “V”, where this woman who is the leader of the human freedom fighters finds herself showing all the signs of the Reptilian Aliens controlling her brain, LOL!

I know that the obsessiveness I tend to get whenever focusing on something that is a threat to me (which, fortunately, few things are) makes it hard to work (I would rather be reading about Y2K, or how to build homes and gardens for cheap, or....), hard to sleep (I would rather stay up and read books on how to prepare, or whatever), and in general, hard to live a totally “normal” life during this time.

Fortunately I am convinced that storage, minimal expenses, maximum self-reliancy, etc. are necessary for other reasons and not just Y2K, so that alone is not the only impelling force behind my desire to get it together.

But I wonder, if I am being so “accidentally” (and even against my will!) “influenced” by positive media, how many other people are, especially people who were never fully informed about it or worried about it in the first place.

Truly I’m beginning to wonder if the world WILL get a clue before it happens. I’m also worrying that if I don’t get a little more emotional impetus back, if they DO, I might not be done preparing, and I could be real sorry as a result.

—PJ Gaenir, Time Bomb 2000 Forums (LUSENET), 05/08/99

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